FINALLY!

Hello all,

You do not know how happy I am to finally have time (well, actually I'm borrowing some time which is supposed to be used for writing this screenplay, which is due tomorrow!!!) to post up my Lent season progress (and struggles).

I was keeping up with all you guys while you were posting and found new goals I could add to my list and try. I originally had no clue what to give up aside from the basic fasting, drinking more H2O, all that. That wasn't really a big adjustment since the meds I'm on kill my appetite during the day anyway. I put on as a goal that I would give up sweets, and that has been a success for the most part, considering that the fundraising I have to do for my Bio class tempts me to put some Snicker bars on credit :).

A big sacrifice I've chosen to give up, however, is the big C- CHEESE!!!! Tylar Moore is the sole reason that Kraft Foods and Sargento have NOT applied for a freaking bailout!!! But I tell you, trying to give this up is almost impossible. Right after Fat Tuesday my training session at school served Lil' Caesars and Jimmy John's. Me not wanting food to go to waste I broke two of my goals right there. On Friday, Shunketta and I went to Applebee's and I had mozzarella sticks. And my mom brought me home tortellini alfredo. I still feel guilty =(. But almost a week into this I feel optimistic. I will get better at this.

I also need to reduce the amount of stimulants I take in each day. I already have my prescribed meds for adhd symptoms and depression. Relatively low doses (50mg and 20mg respectfully). Then each day before school I get a cappucino from George Webbs. $1.95. During the middle of the day I get something caffeinated from the school vending machines which range to $1-1.25. After school I take in another boost of caffeine, that drink being at any price! Other various activities throughout my day adds to my dependence. So I'm cutting back a little on these for sure as well as keeping some major cash in my wallet. This way I can use more self-motivation to concentrate more and get stuff done.

I couldn't find anything else that I could give up that would be even remotely possible for me to stay on top of. Indulgence is my middle name, and I'll only take what I know I can handle, as I hope all of you are doing as well. But I did make several goals addind something positive to my life:

-Reading more books for pleasure: I've checked out 7 books from the library; various topics include gender roles, history of substance abuse, and LGBT rights. I'm going back this week to get books on Black Feminism.

-Not worrying about things I can't change: In stressful times like the ones I have, the last thing I need to do is to be hard on myself. I need to have a more balanced, realistic approach about certain things in life that may be frustrating, but I can't let that get me down. Beating myself up about it won't make the situation any better. Just live and let live.

-Being more patient with my siblings: They are kids after all, no matter how nerve-wrecking and insane they may be. Me and Hailley have been getting along more, and as we all get older it'll get better. I just wish Amari wasn't so damn active!

-Time Management: "Eight hours for work, eight hours for sleep, eight hours for what we will." Too bad life isn't as simple as a 3 block shifts for work, play, and rest. I'm either a workaholic or completely unproductive,counterproductive to some extent. I think this goal will be the hardest one to maintain, especially since I'm breaking it now. But it is for you guys.

I'd love to hear what you guys think. I'll be online all day since I overslept this morning. Love you all.

Tylar